My last natural month

Well, two things arrived. My period, and my IVF schedule. Both mean significant things. Both bring excitement and newness.

So, with my period - I now need to get bloodwork out of the way. I set up an appointment this Friday to get that done (Day 3 testing it's called).

"As part of a basic fertility work-up, your doctor will likely order blood work to check your FSH levels, specifically on day 3 of your menstrual cycle. Sometimes called the Day 3 FSH test, it is a simple blood test meant to measure the amount of FSH in your bloodstream.

FSH, otherwise known as follicle stimulating hormone, is a hormone that tells oocytes, or premature eggs, to begin growing. Each oocyte is contained within a follicle, or little fluid sac. The growth and development of the oocytes is the first part of the process that will, ideally, lead to ovulation."

Then, the doctors create my protocol and order my medication. Then I freak out, shit my pants, and get ready to party.

No, but really.

Here is our schedule + or - a couple of days:

Apr 9 - Start BCP

Apr 26 - Stop BCP

Apr 29 - Start stimulation meds

May 4 - Add antagonist meds

May 10 - Egg Retrieval

May 15 - Day 5 Blastocyst Transfer

If this were the case, my fancy iphone IVF wheel app tells me the following:

Due Date: End of Jan/Beginning of Feb

End of First Trimester: end of July

End of Second Trimester: end of October

So, if that's the case, I'll be my biggest in the coldest of weather and that sounds fanfuckingtastic to me. Big long bulky sweaters and coats and not having to sweat out the four days of unbelievable hotness we have every summer? Sign me up.

In emotional news, I feel a little weepy knowing this is my last unmedicated menstrual cycle. I'm a huge fan of my Womanness and it feels less so when under the control of hormones. In fact it feels quite out of control. So, I shall live up these next 4 weeks or so, and by that I mean taking baths when I want, relaxing when I want, living up my last remaining weeks being solely on loan to Jonah, and try to just appreciate. Which often seems like the biggest challenge in itself.

These cramps feel good, and I think you know what I mean.

New Doctor

Indeed, we have a new doctor! The new clinic called yesterday and got all of my information and Mark's. We set up an appointment with Dr. K for February 25 @ 9. Here is where we will walk her through who we are, what our goals are and what our next steps will be for our May cycle.

How exciting It feels SO good to be somewhere NEW with NEW faces and a new energy. This is exactly what I needed.

In other news, talking to Jonah about potentially having a baby in the house is hilarious. Granted, it won't be for another year or so, so he'll be an even bigger brother - but yesterday we were pretending to run around and find diapers and wipes for the baby. When I said to Jonah "Oh no What if the baby is crying? What will momma do???"

"Nursies baby."

That's right you sweet boy, nursies the baby.

Plans Changing

Well, we made a big move. We switched clinics. We both have come to the conclusion that the passing of our embryo was a bit shady. From the way the entire morning was handled by the clinic, to now - something just didn't seem right. Then we experienced some more shadiness by one of the clinic doctors on another topic I'll keep offline, but the combination of these experiences got us talking on how to try for our third attempt.

M suggested a whole new clinic, closer to home, and just like that, my heart knew it was the right decision for us. But I had just called the old clinic to let them know I got my period (1/28, btw)! I felt pretty damn empowered when they called me to make my baseline appointment and I informed them "We would no longer be proceeding at this time." She sounded a bit shocked on the other line and said she'd "pass that info to my doctor." Sure, go ahead. Tell her I said hi. And bye.

So! Moving on. I submitted an appointment request with the top rated doctor in the clinic, one whom I heard supports breastfeeders during IVF, which is awesome. Now we wait to hear back, and go from there.

New clinic, new doctors, new labs, new nurses, new everything. It's exactly what I needed to feel safe going into this process. I'm feeling more excited, more ready, and more determined to bring this new little one into our lives.

Baseline

So, here we are again. Third time's a charm?!

In all actuality, we need to go into this cycle knowing it could take 2 or 3 cycles before we get a pregnancy given we're dead set on only transferring one embryo. So, I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for at least 6 months of meds and shots and appointments and all of that. 6 months, and if it ends up only being one or two, then super! ;-)

Right now my back is aching, signaling my period about to arrive. This is the period I call the clinic up and schedule my baseline ultrasound and bloodwork. Everything should be good to go in the thyroid and prolactin department, now we're just wanting to know what my FSH comes back as along with my antral follical count.

I'm hoping for a change in protocol this time around, and rather than the 43+ days of injections and menopausal symptoms, I'm trying to target a 2 week protocol instead, called an Antagonist protocol. It's reserved for 'older women' (I'm only 32, wtf.) and for women concerned with getting higher quality rather than quantity. It's a mixed bag. We'd love to have an embryo to freeze if it doesn't work, but we definitely don't want a whole slew of them out there. And I'd definitely like to cut this process to a mere two weeks rather than a month and a half, almost two months if they add birth control pills.

When they get these results, they will sit down and talk about it and discuss what protocol seems best for me and will then let me know what they talked about.

For now, we're off to Hawaii in March, and I'm going to let all of this fall to the side until we get back. This could be our last vacation as just the three of us, so better enjoy it while I can!!